Bravery.
It’s the bravest work a person can do. Opening your eyes to the sound of your alarm. Heart breaking and tearing apart at the seams after a long, tormenting and sleepless night. Your tired body, your tired soul, want nothing more than to just exist within the warmth of yourself. Unwilling to expose your heart…
Stay.
I love that the turn of spring is occurring during this season of my life. The days are growing longer. The weather, growing warmer. Signs of life are sprouting all around. My soul, delighted by each new flower as it blooms. The earth is reawakening. And so am I. The bright, vibrant colors of my…
Cursed.
The devil of my life’s experiences sits comfortably on one of my shoulders and whenever something good happens, he whispers, “This isn’t going to work. It’s too good. Nothing in your life works out, this won’t either.” I sometimes wonder, in my adult life, as if I’m cursed. That – somehow – the universe keeps…
Coming out. Part one.
“Coming out. The two words that defined my entire life thus far. The words I feared. The day I dreaded. I was about to lose everything.” I grew up in a big house in the middle of the woods. The trees and the stream running through our property raised me. Where other girls my age…
Me too. Part four. Family.
“My trauma was hidden and swept under the rug. That day, my trauma became a secret.” Sexual assault isn’t something that just happens and then it’s over. It isn’t just one event – it’s a series of events. Like an earthquake that tears apart the earth. The magnitude of destruction does not stop at ground…
Me too. Part three.
“I was naked. My clothes were taken and examined for evidence. I was urine and blood tested. The bottoms of my fingernails were scraped. I was swabbed on every surface and crevice of my body…” The phone call I made to my mother that dreadful morning is something that still deeply scars her to this…
Me too. Part two.
“He killed someone. Those three words kept circling in my brain. He killed someone. He could kill me.” Part two. May 11th. Today is my birthday. It was a hot, sunny, glorious, early July day. It was, in fact, two days before the heavily celebrated, heavily anticipated, 4th of July. My family has a beach house on…
Me too. Part one.
“He was grooming me. He groomed me for years.” Me too. I mentioned in my first post “Beginnings.” that some of my stories would make you cringe. I feel a moral obligation to offer a clear warning that this post will do just that. You will not laugh. A smile will not creep across your…
Me.
“I hate homosexuality. I hate heterosexuality. I hate that they’re things that exist. I hate them.” …Me. Me. The mess that is me. Where do I even start? As I sit here still longing for words to flow, maybe that’s where I start. The struggle of finding words. Moreover, the struggle of emitting my emotions.…
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Colors of a Woman 